Loneliness

Do you ever get that heavy feeling deep down in your chest?
Like an overwhelming sense of emptiness?
Where you feel as if everything going on has absolutely nothing to do with you.
Because you are nothing.

Unwanted, unloved, not even a speck of dirt on a clean white paper.
Then you think to yourself, no, I am someone.
I have people who love me...

But then of course that heaviness comes back and fills you with doubt.
You don't have any "girlfriends", you're estranged from your family.
All the people you used to be close to have found other friends.

You've gone from being outgoing and friendly to shy and reclusive.
You can be in a room full of people and still feel that loneliness.
It never truly goes away.

Sometimes you can be different.
You're outgoing and friendly and you can make a difference in the world.
Everything is light and bright and you have a purpose.

Then, as always, that loneliness comes creeping back slowly.
And it always finds you.
And now, here you are, sitting at your desk silently shedding tears,
wondering how you can feel so all alone and dark
in an office filled with loud people and bright florescent lights.

Do you ever get that feeling?
No?
Me neither.